I'm not sure if it's your computer/rendering or your FOV (or a combination) that makes it look really choppy, but that's besides the point, I'm not going to make comments on those parts of the video. (but it does make it hard to watch).
On a lot of your kills you do a little 'zoom in' - you but it's more annoying than anything. You zoom in, but it feels more like a 'glitch' rather than zooming in. It's way to fast, since you have a higher fov (or bad quality video? whichever it is), you should have the zoom longer so we actually see who you shot, or no zoom at all. (Often a long zoom can make good shots look more flukey, and take away from quality shots).
Also, are these default textures? If yes, don't make videos with them. It makes the video really hard to watch.
I'm not a fan of the music, but that's just preference. I don't like most songs used in DP2 videos.
But eh, I don't like most of the DP2 videos that come out. There's only a few I've liked. But either way, goodjob on the vid. I'm not commenting on the actual shots and whatnot because that's all opinion. But remember, lucky shots are nice shots, luck is skill.
